Training Schedule Freak Out

     Early in our relationship my husband learned I don't particuarly care for schedules.  "Make a list" he'd helpfully suggest when I had more than a few things on my plate.  "Get yourself a planner and write down everything you need to do."  He is an engineer with an organized and structured engineer brain so this made perfect sense to him.  Why would anyone do it any other way?  Well, because I'm not an engineer.  I married an engineer so I wouldn't have to worry about things involving numbers and analytical thinking.  As far as I'm concerned, list making and schedules fall into that area - his area.  Not mine.  Nope, no lists or schedules for this girl.   Think of all the time I'd waste sitting down to make a list.  Yes, yes, I know.  I hear all of you very organized people right now sitting at your computers, during your scheduled computer time, talking out loud, trying to tell me how much time list making and schedules save.  Be patient with me and read on.
    That was early in our relationship.  As time has moved on I have conformed to grocery lists and the school calendar.  I've realized just like night owls (hey, that's me too) have to conform to the hours of early birds, we unscheduled sorts must also conform to the organized calendar of school, children's extra-curricular activities and the family meal time.  However, I'm still mostly an unorganized personality at heart and when the complications of life begin to swirl around me my reaction can easily fall into the category of an F4 tornado.  In husband lingo that means, "Watch out!" 
     Imagine my husband's surprise when I started keeping a very organized and structured running schedule.   I've been using a training program off of the internet and am able to track all my workouts on-line.  I get daily emails telling me what I am supposed to do for that day whether it be running, cross-training or resting.  I track my pace and how many miles I put on my shoes.  I track how I am feeling for the day, what the weather was like and what I had to eat before my run. I am fanatic about it.  It is my lifeline for this marathon and if I can keep to the schedule I can make it to the starting line.  That's my hope and prayer anyway. 
     If there is anything scarier than watching an unorganized person try and keep up with life without the assistance of a schedule it is watching that same person lose a schedule they hold dear.  I was attempting to change my long run day so that I could run it with my husband and another friend.  My schedule didn't make this process easy and I wound up messing everything up.  Not only did I mess up my future workouts but I even messed up the ones I had already tracked so diligently.  I was beside myself!  Frustrated doesn't even begin to describe it.  I slapped my forehead once, twice, maybe three times.  I threatened to pull my hair out while yanking on a few strands for emphasis.  I shook my head over and over and over again in a sad and dejected way.  It wasn't pretty.  My poor sister in law was sitting beside me on the couch and I'm sure she was wondering if we should call in my cousin who is a psychiatrist for some intervention.    Fortunately, intervention came by way of my husband.  "Put the computer down.  We're watching a movie," he told me.  The next day he calmly took me into his office where he had his plan and together we went through the dates of our long runs.  It still wasn't perfectly back to the way I wanted it.  My past workouts were off by a day and there was no way I could fix them.  However, the future workouts were there for me to reference and that is the really important part anyway.  I could breathe once again.
     On my scheduled run today I got to thinking, how do I react when God messes up my schedule?  Do I respond by saying, "Okay.  I'm unscheduled anyway.  I'll do it your way."  Or do I throw a temper tantrum and say, "Hey!  This is a schedule I hold dear.  What are you doing?  You're messing everything up!"  Maybe I like schedules more than I think.  At least when they pertain to my life.  I'm so glad God is calm and patient with me.  He pulls me aside and reminds me that my life is His.  My past is in the past and can't be changed.  It doesn't matter if it looks messed up.  More importantly, my future is still ahead of me.  If I want to try and schedule it myself He'll allow it but if I want my run through this life to be the best it can be then I need to let Him do what He does best.  He is the wise coach who has organized my life from the beginning.  He knows exactly where I need to be on any given day of any given year.  He is my lifeline. 
Ahhh ... who knew I could learn so much from a schedule?